Wednesday, 31 December 2014

And so it is.

Just like you said it would be. No love, no glory. Just another day of getting up early, putting a brave face on and rolling into everydayness. After doing that for 364 days nothing changes. No big bang at the end, no fireworks (yet) and no miracles. Sometimes I imagine that the love of my life turns up on my doorstep with a bouquet of white roses after realising how much he loves me and asks me to run away together. Oh Disney, what have you done to us... And moreover, poor men... As if they would meet your expectations...

But let's have a look at 2014. What kind of year was it? Good and bad. How cliche. I've had my heart broken, phone calls that were never returned and the ones that I forgot to return accidentally on purpose. I broke someone's heart too, made someone dislike me and temporarily became a person even I didn't like at all. I have made my best friend doubt our friendship. I have realised that, despite our differences, there is a person on this planet that will support me no matter what and not judge me too early. I've managed to pay the first out of thirty years of my mortgage, payed all my council tax instalments in time (and that is a huge success for me). I listened to a lot of men moaning about their wives/girlfriends and still not doing anything to change things. I've watched my family argue, my friends get hurt, my bestie giving birth to a baby boy (not literally) and becoming a mummy. I was proud of my brother who was awarded a PhD.  I have visited Portugal, Croatia, Spain and Poland twice. I ran my first women's 10k with Nike and my first half marathon in just over 2h. I hit 60kg on squats. I became a passionate salsa dancer (and many doubted my grace and balance skills over the years). Got a new tattoo. It's been a rather busy one.

New Year's Resolutions? Not for me. I rarely drink, don't smoke, I work out 6 days a week already. I'm still managing to keep the one from 2 years ago of sorting things out as soon as I think that they need sorting out. I recycle, moisturise after every shower and floss my teeth. no need for change really. Room for improvement? Always. Need to stop checking out my ex on social media but that's not going to happen. Ever. So I guess my NY Resolution could be to not fool myself. Ever again. Look at things as they are and stop starting my sentences with but maybe he... What the last year brought me was a massively important lesson. Not about life and how things click. About myself. I've realised that I am capable of pushing someone to the point where they no longer care. I also realised what I will and will not tolerate. What I want and what I don't want. How much I can take before it makes me lose my mind. I've been constantly pushing myself throughout this year and I pledge to carry on doing so.

I'm not a great fan of saying my thank yous on the forum but there is two fantastic people in my life. People that have always been there for me and supported me in every decision, regardless. People that dare to challenge my beliefs to make me see the other end of the stick and people that taught me how to love (although sometimes I wished they hadn't). My Parents. Thank you guys. You're the best! 

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